Friday, November 21, 2008

MyFitness Strikes Back



For some reason it seems they're taking it personally, I'm not taking it personally. I'm just being a committed and somewhat confused customer. It seems that instead of approaching the matter rationally they decided to counter-attack. Here's their 1-2-3 punch combination.

1. I like the steam room. It's much gentler on my dry eye syndrome than the sauna. Oh, and here's the product placement pitch - " Oxyal - the liquid of gods, too bad it doesn't come in gallon jars ". No no, I'm not getting paid for this, I'm being a brand evangelist...Let's get back to MyFitness. Steam room was closed for maintenance for three days and now when I go in there, I can't even break a sweat. Well, in that case why the hell would I go in there? They did manage to hang up some new signs though. One that states - MySteamRoom and two warning everybody about the hot surfaces. Yes, that is very responsible, too bad it no longer gets hot in there.

2. I would like to be an organized person, I really would, but...maybe it's just not meant to be. So, sometimes I forget to bring a towel with me. It used to be that in these unfortunate instances I was able to rent one for 25EEK's. That's no longer the case. Either planned or unplanned, I got no proof, they're all out of rental towels. Lucky for me and everybody else they have brand new towels for sale. The price is a "measly" 150 EEK's and of course it has a MyFitness LOGO on it, a BIG ONE. Now I happen to have an inside track on this and I happen to know that these towels cost them 65EEK's. That means, they would make their money back by renting them in 2.6 times. I guess that was not good enough for them, but that's not even my point. It's just that I don't need any more towels, I do need a replacement in case I forget mine.

3. ...and this one is a killer, the WiFi that was iffy to begin with is almost gone all together. They should rename it IfFy. My phone is no longer able to access it in about 80% of the gym. Since I couldn't do anything else while pedaling I ended up reading their new "Gym Rules". Turns out that mobile phones are no longer allowed. I guess they don't realize that for lot of people it's either you come to the gym with access to WiFi and other mobile communications or you don't come to the gym at all. I wish them luck...I do.

1-2-3-KO.....but wait, I totally forgot. IT IS NOT THE ONLY GYM IN TOWN.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Wiki Marketing



Is this the future? I think it's definitely part of it and the first example of close to perfect execution is here. Take a look at HBO's True Blood Fan Wiki. HBO has been the most aggressive brand when it comes to engaging with the audience or allowing fans to take content and post it on other sites. The result - visitors to the "True Blood" wiki site stay 61% longer than on HBO's traditional site. Each fan contributes about six posts to the forum. The average time that visitors remain is 10 minutes on the wiki, compared with six minutes on HBO's main site. Need I say more.

Here it is : http://truebloodwiki.hbo.com/

NB! Obviously Wiki Marketing is not for every brand. You do need enthusiastic brand evangelists to be successful with this, but if you do have them - sky's the limit.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

In Search of a Perfect Burger at Swissotel

This was supposed to be a post on my food blog, but things don't always work out the way you plan. I wanted to compare three burgers I was gonna stuff myself with at three different places all in one day. I picked No3 Deli at Swissotel, Museum and McDonald's.
This is what happened.

15.30 I walk in the door at the Swissotel knowing that I have to attend a Deloitte round-table at 16.00(which by the way was surprisingly delightful). So, here I am. I say "Hello" and smile to the girls of No3 and before sitting down tell them that last night I heard somebody rave about their burger. Unfortunately I'm in real hurry so could you please tell me how long it will take. The response I receive is 5 to 10 minutes. Great, in that case I'll have a burger and a beer, please.

15.42 I walk up to the counter to remind them that...I really would like my beer now. They say OK.

15.52 My beer arrives.

15.55 My beer is finished. (Well... I had no idea they come in such tiny sizes anywhere in a world).

15.59 I walk up to the counter to announce that it's time for me to leave and I'm really not happy about the growling in my stomach. They tell me that it usually takes about 20 minutes for them to prepare a burger. At this point I'm not sure which way to go - either I could complain that they promised me a burger in 5 to 10 minutes, or I could point out that it's been exactly 29 minutes since I ordered my effing burger.

16.00 I pay for my burger and a beer, which by the way was quite a bit and leave mumbling ... I don't wanna use these words. No - we are sorry, no - maybe you could come back later to enjoy your burger, our burgers really are great, nothing. No - FUCKING A - nothing, nothing, nothing, nothing.

...and just recently I was told by a somewhat of an inside source that the occupancy rate at Swissotel hovers around 8%. I was the only customer who was ordering food, I was the only customer who made it clear that everything is not Hunky-dory. I don't know, how 'bout using the resources you have for the rest of the 92%, who are just sitting around doing nothing. I'm sure that if you combine everybody you can make it happen - it's just one burger.

I did get it four hours later at the Museum. It was not perfect, but boy was it satisfying.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Skype Has Given Up on Us.

On Sunday I was on Skype Video Call for 27 minutes. The SKYPE VIDEO CALL was dropped by SKYPE exactly 7 times. Then I noticed something, it used to be that after a Skype call they tried to conduct a quick survey, mainly questions about call quality and customer satisfaction. Guess what, they no longer do that. I wonder why, specially that I think I could've provided some valuable customer insight on Sunday. Probably going something like this : U GUYS SUCK & UFIDIOTS R DEAD,U JUST DON'T KNOW IT YET,EMBEDDED CHAT & VCHAT THAT WORKS WILL BURY U.

Anyhow I think I'll try the new Google Video Chat

NB. Don't think that I don't notice the negativity of some of the last posts, believe me, it is not intentional. Please, somebody give me a reason to praise you, your product and your service. I literally beg you. Exceptional services experiences are rarely forgotten. Think about it.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

MyFitness Obviously not Worried about MyMentalFitness



CONFESSION

I have a confession to make - I work out a lot. It's borderline obsession or addiction if you prefer. Almost every day I spend an hour on a stationary bike while reading my mails and sometimes answering them, then I hit the gym or the tennis court for another hour or two. I always feel the best right after working out. So it should be understood that I also take the facility I work out at very seriously.


PROBLEM

Recently my gym merged or was bought up or something like that. Now it's MyFitness. Since that happened some things have changed. First of all a big branding operation or maybe I should call it a branding tornado has overtaken everything. The entrance to the gym was redesigned to fit the universal MyFitness theme. Unfortunately they hired the same designer who did the "Korovo Milkbar" in Clockwork Orange and now when I walk in my cornias are literally screaming. So even though you don't need sunglasses in Estonia you'll need them if you do go to MyFitness.

Then they plastered every possible surface with labels claiming the obvious
like MyPool, MyStretchingRoom, MySpinning, MyLadiesLockerroom, MyToilets and so on. Today standing at the MyUrinal in the MyToilet in the MyMensShowers in the MyMensLockerroom I was surprised not to find a label stating MyPenis after unzipping. C'mon guys, what are you trying to do? Take over the world by MyBrainwashing everyone.


BIGGER PROBLEM

There is a label from a shampoo bottle stuck on a shower-stall wall. It's been there for three days now. No biggy right? But what does it mean? OOPS, it means that the cleaning lady hasn't been to that shower-stall for 1 - 2 - 3 days. My, my, my...

The machines and the stationary bikes are tricky, well actually the tricky part is to pick which one to use, since most of them are missing something or are broken and down right dangerous. My, my, my...

The check-in at the entrance, that's right the check-in, has two computers designated for client check-in. One of them has never worked. To purchase a bottle of water requires at least a doctorate in logistics because nobody knows how to explain where to pay for it. How about a label saying "Pay for MyWater here". My, my, my...

Are you sick of my my-mys yet? Now you know how I feel.

Big part of the MyFitness theme is blasting music that's truly unbearable at high volumes and everywhere. I'm not gonna go into different musical tastes here and I don't think they should play music I like, but why did they have to install speakers in every hidden corner of every hidden hallway. Just yesterday I received a Skype VOIP call on my mobile and you know how Skype is... Well long story short - I couldn't hear anything, no matter where I moved because of the horror coming from the speakers. My, my, my...


DILEMMA

I have been paying for my gym privileges around 750EEK's a month. Hmmm, in fact exactly 750EEK's a month. Now I just found out that the type of membership I have will be 1299EEK's a month. HELLOOOOO. Haven't you noticed, there's a reasonable chance out there, that this is Armageddon, the Apocalypse, the end of the world as we know it. Even if it's not, I don't think many would argue that tougher times are ahead. Is this how you react to economic downfall and worldwide financial crisis - by raising prices by 70%?


CONCLUSION

The near future will be about value and added value for customers, not graphic design driven branding.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Flossie Man Vending Machine


Love original, love ballsy and most of all love funny. Yes not everybody can do this, not every brand is suitable and not everybody has the budget. Then again if you pull the throw-away green from prime-time Tv budgets...it could work. Somehow I doubt Flossie will win many prestigious awards with this campaign, but I'm sure their target group will remember this for years and tell and tell their friends.


Crowdsourcing Lessons

First of all thank you goes out to everybody who participated. I really appreciate your input and big thanks for nothing to everyone who didn't.

So what did I learn from my little experiment? That if you make it easy enough to participate lot of people will and you shouldn't worry about the ones who don't. Also that James Surowiecki is right, the result will be smart and selfless.

Then again the most important lesson would be the way people communicate in today's world. I received responses on these following channels : blog comment posts, e-mail,Twitter, SMS, Skype, phone calls and vis-à-vis conversation.

Lesson being that no matter what's the message, if you want to get it across, you shouldn't ignore any of the channels. Go where the conversation takes place.

Friday, November 7, 2008

My Very Own Little Crowdsourcing Project.

I NEED YOUR HELP. I can't decide. PLEASE.

Looking for a new place to live, so cast your vote in the comments. Simple A,B,C or F is sufficient, feel free to explain your choice, but it's not necessary.

A






B






C






F



Thursday, November 6, 2008

Tuesday, November 4, 2008